~5 Simple Intimacy Tips to Live By ~

  

                                         ~5 Simple Intimacy Tips to Live By ~           

 

Intimacy and Romance Tip #1:

Flowers and candy are nice, and occasionally for a special occasion these gifts are always pleasant to receive, but when money is tight, for some of you these gifts are frivolous, and flowers die and candy is eaten - and then there is nothing left.

For most women, she truly doesn't want you to spend a whole lot of money on her to show her you love and care about her. Just quality time!!

Buying her a bouquet of flowers occasionally, as I said earlier, is perfectly acceptable, but don't expect a gift you bought with cash to bring about the type of intimacy she needs. Try a different kind of gift and see how she responds. Like a new branded handbag, shoes, clothing, a piece of jewelry, a 10 star restaurant with all the ambiance.

Intimacy and Romance Tip #2:

Let her know you are thinking about her; listen and communicate especially the first time that you got together. This really takes very little effort and costs absolutely nothing but your time.

My husband sends me several text messages throughout the day while he's doing several errands, just to say he's thinking about me and loves me. I find myself really looking forward to these, and if most of the day goes by and I haven't received one yet, I realize how much I miss them!

One morning, I woke after he was already up; preparing for the day I went into the bathroom to take a shower, there was fresh towels, a wash cloth and roses. Wow! What a surprise…

These little reminders that your woman is on your mind even when you are not with her will make her feel special and important and they take very little time and effort on your part for such a large payoff in return.

Intimacy and Romance Tip #3:

Give her a gift for no reason at all and make it something personal, special even if it is cleaning the house. My husband loves to clean and moves things around. I simply adore the next decorating idea that he comes up with or my input on where things should be placed. I promise if you communicate with each other the things that you want in life it can happen.

Intimacy and Romance Tip #4:

Touch your woman! I'm not talking in a sexual or suggestive way either. One of the things that just does it for me is when my husband seeks me out before he does anything else and kisses, touches, pats, strokes -- something. It doesn't take much, but when you greet her, it doesn't matter if you have been gone for a few minutes or a few days, touch her, kiss her and hug her. Kiss her goodbye, even if you are just running to the store for a few minutes.

When she's standing at the sink washing dishes or at the stove cooking, come up behind her and put your arms around her. Kiss her neck, make her stop for a minute to give you a hug - but touch her.

However, if you take that touching and turn it into something sexually suggestive, it doesn't count in the romance and intimacy department. Just touch her and let her know you enjoy the physical presence of her company. The power of touch is amazing - try it, and you'll see.

Romance and Intimacy Tip #5:

Along the lines of touching her, tip number five deals with physical intimacy - but again, without it leading to sex - but goes a bit further. Intimacy and romance are not just about flowers, poetry, love songs, and gifts... a couple should spend time together in physical situations that do not always lead to sexual relations.

Brush her hair, rub lotion on her back, her legs, her feet,  for her, give her a sensual (not sexual) massage, kiss her forehead or fingertips or neck.

Cuddling on the couch, "making out" with no expectations, walking hand in hand, wrapping your arm around her and holding her close at a movie, slow dancing, snuggling under a blanket in front of a fire, if you have one - these are all physical intimacies that are not sexually related that make such a huge difference for the woman in your life.

Proverbs 5:19
A loving doe, a graceful deer—may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be captivated by her loveSee More

 

Overcoming Anxieties In Your Marriage

Behind many worries and fears is death. No one likes to admit this because they do not have any way of handling death and its fears.

God knows that as long as we fear death, we cannot be free to live for Him. Powerful truths are shared throughout this article to inspire us to be one of God's overcomers of anxiety.  Real life stories of a recent Christian facing death boldly is an important principle to overcoming the anxieties in your life and marriage.  And which of you by being anxious can add a single cubit to his life's span?
"If then you cannot do even a very little thing,why are you anxious about other matters? Luke 12:25,26


Let us tell you this story about a man that was married for over 26 years; left his home to be out there in the world to be with other women; caught AIDS and brought it back to his WIFE. Everything in his life growing up depended on walking with God until one day He was tempted by the enemy. This gentleman walked out on his family; slept around with so many women; and contracted AIDS. One day he came home to his wife and slept with her. Several years went by; while still out in the street got very sick and was rushed to the hospital in intensive care with no insurance. The doctors took care of him and told him that he was too far gone for them to do any thing. The doctors told the children what type of disease he had and the children went crazy. Several days after the incident they had to find some way to get their mother to the doctor to have her tested and for sure the test came back that she had the disease. Talking about Oversoming Anxieties; this woman who had so much faith in God did not want to live. Several Months go by and the father passes away. Now; left with carrying the disease and the obstacles of not understanding; because this is the only man that she had ever slept with. The question is WHY?

 We are not sure how many times you were caught worrying: a disease, a test, a wife, a husband, a friend, an appointment, meeting a stranger, being in danger, etc. The list goes on and on. We suppose if each of us made a list of the things we have worried over, we would be really surprised. Surprised at what? Mostly surprised that Jesus' observation is true in every case. Worry never, never helps.

Be an  Overcomer or overcome? Your decision. God has made the victory possible through Jesus Christ.

Our goal for this story was to give you a testimony to share with your friends and family. Remember to thank God by telling other people how He has helped you overcome your own anxieties!

As we explore God's truths from the scriptures, we are challenged to live in God's amazing peace. As rumors of war, economic setbacks, disease, and terrorism impact our lives along with the many other concerns of life, murder, lying, cheating, etc; these truths become all important. We get to see and experience God's love and holiness in a very practical way.

A group workshop or seminar is much more effective in learning the truths of Overcoming Anxieties in Your Marriage consider hosting a seminar or conference today:

• A marriage retreat
• A campus, city or town outreach

• A long weekend church seminar.
• A workshop
• A Conference

If you like to contact us about having Jerome or Ivy speak, please feel free to contact us at marriage4lifeinstitute@gmail.com

 

Oneness and Unity!!

Philippians 2:2 - Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, [being] of one accord, of one mind.

Have you watched any of the sports teams this year? The sports teams are amazing and some are incredible. It takes skill, practice and team work to accomplish greatness. IWe love hearing the announcers say that a team was not selfish and had learned the art of working together. They knew if they all won, then they won as an individual. They had the concept of oneness and unity. The teams that didn’t have that concept did poorly and you can see how  they blamed each other for their fall. You also could see certain team members standing out and being somewhat selfish in their behaviors. The difference between those teams that worked together and those that didn’t are astounding. 
  
Did you know that marriage is a team sport? You either win together or you lose together. It takes a while for couples to get that concept. In the beginning of marriages, couples seem to want to compete against each other. If something needs to be done, they take account of who had done the most work that day or who did the chore last and then they would argue about who was carrying the most responsibility in the relationship. This is not playing as a team. This is division and divide is what we did. The selfishness runs deep and is frequently the foundation for a good argument. Some couples do not know what it means to work together and be in unity. We are quite certain that this attitude is the most contributing factor in the break of most relationships. Selfishness  is the  part of most  marriages.
  
We know for sure that if  you work as a team helping  each other out; you will know more and more about your spouse.  If one  cooks the other is theree to help clean up the dishes. If he/she is doing the laundry, he/she could fold the clothes when they came out of the dryer. If he/she went to change the sheets on the bed, you could be there  to help. Day by day wyou can learn to share the responsibilities and work together. When you learn that sharing the load is so much easier than fighting over who did what or worse yet, letting one  do the majority of the work and then allowing resentment to set in. Just like being on a sports team, you have learned the art of oneness and unity. It feels good to be a winning team.
Marriage is a team sport. You either win together or you lose together. How are you doing in your marriage? Do you work together as a team or do you work against each other? Maybe it’s time to sit down and communicate about how you can be a better team and win at this thing called marriage

 

Decisions

 

 

 Don’t base your decisions on the advice of people who don’t have to deal with the results. When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for you to decide whether or not to accept your destiny.”

 John 1:8 Look to yourselves, that we do not lose those things we worked for, but that we may receive a full reward.

Breaking the Cycle of Retaliation

Retaliation-to do something bad to someone who has hurt you or treated you badly: to get revenge against someone

Revenge-retaliate,Get Even-retaliate,Vengeance-retailate

Anger-retailate .

Solomon replied, “If he behaves himself, he will not be harmed; but if he does not, he shall die.” 1 Kings 1:52

Forgiveness is stronger than revenge.

While Adonijah feared for his life and expected the severest punishment, Solomon simply dismissed his brother and sent him home. As a new king, Solomon had the power to kill his rivals, something Adonijah would have done had his conspiracy succeeded. But Solomon acted as if he had nothing to prove, thus demonstrating his authority and power. Sometimes forgiving a personal attack shows more strength than lashing out in revenge.

Trying to prove one’s power and authority often proves only one’s fear.Remember when you have been

Rejected,Denied, Disapproved of & lonely; God is there with you!!

Remember that God’s silence does not mean rejection.

Job was especially upset because God was silent, giving no reasons for his suffering. Job misinterpreted God’s silence as rejection, and once again he said that it was not his suffering that bothered him as much as this apparent rejection. If God had given reasons, however, Job’s faith would probably not have been stretched and strengthened.

· How many times has God done the same for us, holding us back from sin in ways we can’t even detect?

· We have no way of knowing—we just know from this story that he can.

· God works just as often in ways we can’t see as in ways we can.

We are to do good to those who wrong us! Our desire should not be to keep score, but to love and forgive. This is not natural—it is supernatural.

Only God can give us the strength to love as he does. Instead of planning revenge, vengeance, getting even, hating the other with much anger, we are to pray for those who hurt us or you.

Romans 12:9-21

OOPS! I Did IT Again!!!

I must admit that I had a rough weekend….I’m not proud to say that I behaved in a terrible way on Friday night. I reverted back to some of my old behaviors and as a result, I really hurt my husband. I can honestly say that I saw myself doing what I didn’t want to do but I did it anyway. I knew the outcome was going to be hurtful and that we would need to recover from it but I chose to behave poorly anyway. As a result, it took a little time for us to recover and I spent my Saturday feeling sad that I had not made a better choice. I found it really hard to forgive myself even after my spouse had forgiven me. That’s the hardest part for me; forgiving myself. You would think that I would be better at forgiving myself since I’m a believer and work with others to learn the art of forgiveness. Nope…..not an easy thing for me to do because I have a personality that doesn’t want to make mistakes in the first place so when I do, it’s easy to beat myself up and not want to forgive my mistakes.
Have you ever done that? Have you ever behaved in a way that you didn’t want to and knew you needed to change what you were doing but you did the wrong thing anyway? Do you find it hard to forgive yourself even after your partner has forgiven you?
I think we all find ourselves doing that in relationships. We start with the right intentions in mind but old habits die hard and we find ourselves doing something we know won’t help the relationship. After we have hurt the other person, we allow guilt and shame to keep us from forgiving ourselves and this makes the recovery from the situation more difficult.
I find that the recovery from making the wrong choice can be tough. It puts a “scrape” in our relationship and it takes time to heal the wound. The good news is that relationships are resilient and though at first, it may seem as if the brokenness can never be repaired, people have a marvelous ability to forgive. The tough part is holding on through the rebuilding phase while consistency replaces doubt, time reduces discomfort and forgiveness replaces hurt.
Where is your relationship today? Do you need to ask your spouse for forgiveness? Do you need to forgive yourself for something you have done? Today is a good day to start the “rebuilding” phase in your relationship. Today is a day to start fresh and try again.